ANGER MANAGEMENT IN ISLAM

Anger is one of the evil whispers of Shaytaan, which leads to so many evils and tragedies, of which only Allah knows their full extent. For this reason Islam has a great deal to say about this bad characteristic, and the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) described cures for this "disease" and ways to limit its effects, among which are the following:

(1) Seeking refuge with Allah from the Shaytaan:

Sulayman ibn Sard said: "I was sitting with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), and two men were slandering one another. One of them was red in the face, and the veins on his neck were standing out. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, 'I know a word which, if he were to say it, what he feels would go away. If he said "I seek refuge with Allah from the Shaytaan," what he feels (i.e., his anger) would go away.'" (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 6/337)

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "If a man gets angry and says, 'I seek refuge with Allah,' his anger will go away." (Saheeh al-Jaami' al-Sagheer, no. 695)

(2) Keeping silent:

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "If any of you becomes angry, let him keep silent." (Reported by Imaam Ahmad, al-Musnad, 1/329; see also Saheeh al-Jaami', 693, 4027).

This is because in most cases, the angry person loses self control and could utter words of kufr (from which we seek refuge with Allah), or curses, or the word of divorce (talaaq) which would destroy his home, or words of slander which would bring him the enmity and hatred of others. So, in short, keeping silent is the solution which helps one to avoid all that.

(3) Not moving:

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "If any of you becomes angry and he is standing, let him sit down, so his anger will go away; if it does not go away, let him lie down."

The narrator of this hadeeth is Abu Dharr (may Allah be pleased with him), and there is a story connected to his telling of it: he was taking his camels to drink at a trough that he owned, when some other people came along and said (to one another), "Who can compete with Abu Dharr (in bringing animals to drink) and make his hair stand on end?" A man said, "I can," so he brought his animals and competed with Abu Dharr, with the result that the trough was broken. [i.e., Abu Dharr was expecting help in watering his camels, but instead the man misbehaved and caused the trough to be broken]. Abu Dharr was standing, so he sat down, then he laid down. Someone asked him, "O Abu Dharr, why did you sit down then lie down?" He said: "The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) said: . . ." and quoted the hadeeth. (The hadeeth and this story may be found in Musnad Ahmad, 5/152; see also Saheeh al-Jaami', no. 694).

According to another report, Abu Dharr was watering his animals at the trough, when another man made him angry, so he sat down . . . (Fayd al-Qadeer, al-Manaawi, 1/408)

Among the benefits of this advice given by the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) is the fact that it prevents the angry person from going out of control, because he could strike out and injure someone, or even kill - as we will find out shortly - or he could destroy possessions and so on. Sitting down makes it less likely that he will become overexcited, and lying down makes it even less likely that he will do something crazy or harmful. Al-'Allaamah al-Khattaabi, may Allah have mercy on him, said in his commentary on Abu Dawud: "One who is standing is in a position to strike and destroy, while the one who is sitting is less likely to do that, and the one who is lying down can do neither. It is possible that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) told the angry person to sit down or lie down so that he would not do something that he would later regret. And Allah knows best." (Sunan Abi Dawud, with Ma'aalim al-Sunan, 5/141)

(4) Following the advice of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him):

Abu Hurayrah, may Allah be pleased with him, reported that a man said to the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), "Advise me." He said, "Do not become angry." The man repeated his request several times, and each time the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) told him, "Do not become angry." (Reported by al-Bukhaari, Fath al-Bari, 10/456)

According to another report, the man said: "I thought about what the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, and I realized that anger combines all kinds of evil." (Musnad Ahmad, 5/373)

(5) Do not become angry and Paradise will be yours (a saheeh hadeeth, see Saheeh al-Jaami', 7374. Ibn Hajr attributed it to al-Tabaraani, see al-Fath 4/465):

Remembering what Allah has promised to the righteous (muttaqeen) who keep away from the causes of anger and struggle within themselves to control it, is one of the most effective ways of extinguishing the flames of anger. One of the ahaadeeth that describe the great reward for doing this is: "Whoever controls his anger at the time when he has the means to act upon it, Allah will fill his heart with contentment on the Day of Resurrection." (Reported by al-Tabaraani, 12/453, see also Saheeh al-Jaami', 6518).

Another great reward is described in the Prophet's words: "Whoever controls his anger at the time when he has the means to act upon it, Allah will call him before all of mankind on the Day of Resurrection, and will let him choose of the Hoor al-'Iyn whoever he ants." (Reported by Abu Dawud, 4777, and others. It is classified as hasan in Saheeh al-Jaami, 6518).

(6) Knowing the high status and advantages offered to those who control themselves:

The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "The strong man is not the one who can overpower others (in wrestling); rather, the strong man is the one who controls himself when he gets angry." (Reported by Ahmad, 2/236; the hadeeth is agreed upon). The greater the anger, the higher the status of the one who controls himself. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said: "The strongest man is the one who, when he gets angry and his face reddens and his hackles rise, is able to defeat his anger." (Reported by Imaam Ahmad, 5/367, and classified as hasan in Saheeh al-Jaami', 3859)

Anas reported that the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) passed by some people who were wrestling. He asked, "What is this?" They said: "So-and-so is the strongest, he can beat anybody." The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) said, "Shall I not tell you who is even stronger then him? The man who, when he is mistreated by another, controls his anger, has defeated his own shaytaan and the shaytaan of the one who made him angry." (Reported by al-Bazzaar, and Ibn Hajr said its isnaad is saheeh. Al-Fath, 10/519)

(7) Following the Prophet's example in the case of anger:

The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allaah be upon him) is our leader and has set the highest example in this matter, as is recorded in a number of ahaadeeth. One of the most famous was reported by Anas, may Allah be pleased with him, who said: "I was walking with the Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him), and he was wearing a Najraani cloak with a rough collar. A Bedouin came and seized him roughly by the edge of his cloak, and I saw the marks left on his neck by the collar. Then the Bedouin ordered him to give him some of the wealth of Allah that he had. The Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) turned to him and smiled, then ordered that he should be given something." (Agreed upon. Fath al-Baari, 10/375)

Another way in which we can follow the example of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) is by making our anger for the sake of Allah, when His rights are violated. This is the kind of anger which is praiseworthy. So the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) became angry when he was told about the imaam who was putting people off the prayer by making it too long; when he saw a curtain with pictures of animate creatures in 'Aa'ishah's house; when Usaamah spoke to him about the Makhzoomi woman who had been convicted of theft, and he said "Do you seek to intervene concerning one of the punishments prescribed by Allah?"; when he was asked questions that he disliked, and so on. His anger was purely for the sake of Allah.

(8) Knowing that resisting anger is one of the signs of righteousness (taqwaa):

The righteous (al-muttaqoon) are those praised by Allah in the Qur'aan and by His Messenger (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him). Paradise as wide as heaven and earth has been prepared for them. One of their characteristics is that they (interpretation of the meaning) "spend (in Allah's Cause) in prosperity and in adversity, [they] repress anger, and [they] pardon men; verily, Allah loves al-muhsinoon (the good-doers)." [Aal 'Imraan 3:134]
These are the ones whose good character and beautiful attributes and deeds Allah has mentioned, and whom people admire and want to emulate. One of their characteristics is that (interpretation of the meaning) ". . . when they are angry, they forgive." [al-Shooraa 42:47]

(9) Listening to reminders:

Anger is a part of human nature, and people vary in their anger. It may be difficult for a man not to get angry, but sincere people will remember Allah when they are reminded, and they will not overstep the mark.

Some examples follow:

Ibn 'Abbaas (may Allah be pleased with him) reported that a man sought permission to speak to 'Umar ibn al-Khattaab (may Allah be pleased with him), then he said: "O son of al-Khattaab, you are not giving us much and you are not judging fairly between us." 'Umar (may Allah be pleased with him) was so angry that he was about to attack the man, but al-Hurr ibn Qays, who was one of those present, said: "O Ameer al-Mu'mineen, Allah said to His Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) (interpretation of the meaning): 'Show forgiveness, enjoin what is good, and turn away from the foolish' [al-A'raaf 7:199]. This man is one of the foolish." By Allah, 'Umar could go no further after al-Hurr had recited this aayah to him, and he a man who was careful to adhere to the Book of Allah. (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 4/304).
This is how the Muslim should be. The evil munaafiq (hypocrite) was not like this when he was told the hadeeth of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) and one of the Companions said to him, "Seek refuge with Allah from the Shaytaan." He said to the one who reminded him, "Do you think I am crazy? Go away!" (Reported by al-Bukhaari, al-Fath, 1/465). We seek refuge with Allah from failure.

(10) Knowing the bad effects of anger:

The negative effects of anger are many; in short they cause damage to one's own self and to others. The angry person may utter words of slander and obscenity, he may attack others (physically) in an uncontrolled manner, even to the point of killing. The following story contains a valuable lesson:

'Ilqimah ibn Waa'il reported that his father (may Allah be pleased with him) told him: "I was sitting with the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) when a man came to him leading another man by a rope. He said, 'O Messenger of Allah, this man killed my brother.' The Messenger of Allah (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) asked him, 'Did you kill him?' He said, 'Yes, I killed him.' He asked, 'How did you kill him?' He said, 'He and I were hitting a tree to make the leaves fall, for animal feed, and he slandered me, so I struck him on the side of the head with an axe, and killed him.' . . ." (Reported by Muslim, 1307, edited by al-Baaqi).

Anger could lead to less than killing, such as wounding and breaking bones. If the one who caused the anger runs away, the angry person turns his anger in on himself, so he may tear his clothes, or strike his cheeks, or have a fit, or fall unconscious, or he may break dishes and plates, or break furniture.

In the worst cases, anger results in social disasters and the breaking of family ties, i.e., divorce. Ask many of those who divorced their wives, and they will tell you: it was in a moment of anger. This divorce results in misery for the children, regret and frustration, a hard and difficult life, all as a result of anger. If they had remembered Allah, come to their senses, restrained their anger and sought refuge with Allah, none of this would have happened. Going against the sharee'ah only results in loss.

The damage to health that results from anger can only be described by doctors, such as thrombosis, high blood pressure, tachycardia (abnormally rapid heartbeat) and hyperventilation (rapid, shallow breathing), which can lead to fatal heart attacks, diabetes, etc. We ask Allah for good health.

(11) The angry person should think about himself during moments of anger:

If the angry person could see himself in the mirror when he is angry, he would hate himself and the way he looks. If he could see the way he changes, and the way his body and limbs shake, how his eyes glare and how out of control and crazy his behaviour is, he would despise himself and be revolted by his own appearance. It is well-known that inner ugliness is even worse than outer ugliness; how happy the Shaytaan must be when a person is in this state! We seek refuge with Allah from the Shaytaan and from failure.

(12) Du'aa':

Du'aa' is always the weapon of the believer, whereby he asks Allah to protect him from evil, trouble and bad behaviour and seeks refuge with Him from falling into the pit of kufr or wrongdoing because of anger. One of the three things that can help save him is: being fair at times of contentment and of anger (Saheeh al-Jaami', 3039). One of the du'aa's of the Prophet (peace and blessings of Allah be upon him) was:

"O Allah, by Your knowledge of the Unseen and Your power over Your creation, keep me alive for as long as You know life is good for me, and cause me to die when You know death is good for me. O Allah, I ask You to make me fear You in secret and in public, and I ask You to make me speak the truth in times of contentment and of anger. I ask You not to let me be extravagant in poverty or in prosperity. I ask You for continuous blessings, and for contentment that does not end. I ask You to let me accept Your decree, and for a good life after death. I ask You for the joy of seeing Your face and for the longing to meet You, without going through diseases and misguiding fitnah (trials). O Allah, adorn us with the adornment of faith and make us among those who are guided. Praise be to Allah, the Lord of the Worlds."

"And follow not (O man i.e., say not, or do not do or witness not) that of which you have no knowledge. Verily! The hearing, and the sight, and the heart, of each of those one will be questioned (by Allah)." (Al-Isra' 17:36)

POINTERS ON CHOOSING MARRIAGE PARTNERS

In light of the experience of the past years, it is time to take stock and try to halt the ever-mounting tide of divorces among Muslims. It is not unusual today to find Muslim women (and even an occasional Muslim man) who, by the time they are 30 or 35, have been married three or four times, their children suffering again and again through the trauma of fatherless and broken homes. Accordingly, we may list a few essential points to be considered by both brothers and sisters in the process of choosing a partner in life (although the masculine pronoun has been used throughout for the sake of simplicity, the following is generally equally applicable to both men and women).

1. Du'a.
Unceasingly ask help and guidance from Allah, Most High, in the matter of finding and choosing a mate. As often as you feel it necessary, pray Salaah al-Istikhara, Islam's special prayer for guidance, in order to reach a suitable decision.

2. Consult your heart.
Listen to what your inner voice, the 'radar' which Allah has given you to guide you, tells you about the prospective partner. It is likely to be more correct than your mind, which often plays tricks and can rationalise almost any- thing. For many people, first impressions are often the most accurate.

3. Enquire.
Find out the reason why this man wants to marry you. Is he interested in you as an individual or will just any person do? Why is he not doing the logical thing, that is, to marry someone from his culture? If there is evidence that the primary reason for this marriage, despite claims to the contrary, is for convenience (greencard, money, property, etc.), forget it. This spells trouble.

4. Get to know your prospective partner, within the limits of what is permissible in Islam, before deciding on marriage.
Just ' seeing' someone once or twice in the company of others, who may be anxious for this marriage to take place, is simply not enough under today's conditions, where two per- sons of totally dis-similar backgrounds are meeting each other without the safeguards of families. Without violating Islam's prohibition about being alone, try to understand his nature, what makes him tick, his temperament, what he might be like to live with.

5. Talk to several people who know your prospective partner, not just one, or have someone whom you can trust do this for you.
Ask about him from various people, not just from his friends because they may conceal facts to do him a favour. And ask not only about his background, career, Islamicity, etc., but about such crucial matters as whether he gets angry easily; what he does when he is 'mad'; whether he is patient, polite, considerate; how he gets along with people; how he relates to the opposite sex; what sort of relationship he has with his mother and father; whether he is fond of children; what his personal habits are, etc. And find out about his plans for the future from people who know him. Do they coincide with what he has told you? Go into as much detail as possible. Check out his plans for the future - where you will live and what your lifestyle will be, his attitudes toward money and possessions and the like. If you can't get answers to such crucial questions from people who know him, ask him yourself and try to make sure he is not just saying what he knows you want to hear. Too many people will make all kinds of promises before marriages in order to secure the partner they want but afterwards forget that they ever made them, (this naturally applies equally to women as to men).

6. Find out about his family, his relations with his parents, brothers and sisters.
What will his obligations be to them in the future? How will this affect where and under what conditions you will live? What are the character and temperament of each of his parents? Will they live with you or you with them? And are they pleased with his prospective marriage to you or not? Although it may not be the case in most Western marriages, among Muslims such issues are often crucial to the success or failure of a marriage, and answers to these questions need to be satisfactory to ensure a peaceful married life.

7. Understand each other's expectations.
Try to get a sense of your prospective partner's under- standing of the marriage relationship, how he will behave in various situations, and what he wants of you as his spouse. These are issues which should be discussed clearly and unambiguously as the negotiations progress, not left to become sources of disharmony after the marriage because they were never brought up beforehand. If you are too shy to ask certain questions, have a person you trust do it for you. At an advanced stage of the negotiations, such a discussion should include such matters as birth control, when children are to be expected, how they are to be raised, how he feels about helping with housework and with the children's upbringing, whether or not you may go to school or work, relations with his family and yours, and other vital issues.

8. See him interacting with others in various situations.
The more varied conditions under which you are able to observe your prospective partner, the more clues you will have as to his mode of dealing with people and circumstances.

9. Find out what his understanding of Islam is and whether it is compatible with your own.
This is a very important matter. Is he expecting you to do many things which you have not done up to this point? If he emphasises " Haraams", especially if you are a new Muslimah, and seems unable to tolerate your viewpoint, chances are your marriage will be in trouble unless you are flexible enough to accommodate yourself to his point of view and possibly a very restrictive lifestyle. Let him spell out to you clearly how he intends to practise Islam and how he wants you to practise it as his wife so there will be no misunderstandings later.

10. Don't be in a hurry.
So many marriages have broken because the partners are in such haste that they don't take time to make such vital checks as the ones outlined above and rush into things. Shocking as it may seem, marriages between Muslims which are contracted and then broken within a week or a month or a year have become common place occurrences among us. Don't add yourself to the list of marriage casualties because you couldn't take time or were too desperate for marriage to find out about or get to know the person with whom you plan to spend the rest of your life.

11. Ask yourself, Do I want this man/woman to be the father/mother of my children?
If it doesn't feel just right to you, think it over again. Remember, marriage is not just for today or tomorrow but for life, and for the primary purpose of building a family. If the person in question doesn't seem like the sort who would make a good parent, you are likely to find yourself struggling to raise your children without any help from him or her - or even with negative input - in the future.

12. Never allow yourself to be pressured or talked into a marriage.
Your heart must feel good about it, not someone else's. Again, allegations of "Islamicity" - he is pious, has a beard, frequents the Masjid, knows about Islam; she wears Hijab, does not talk to men- are not necessarily guarantees of a good partner for you or of a good marriage, but are only a part of a total picture. If an individual practises the Sunnah only in relation to worship or externals, chances are he /she has not really understood and is not really living Islam. Possessing the affection and Rahmah (mercy) which Islam enjoins between marriage partners is vital for a successful relationship, and these are the important traits to be looked for in a prospective partner.

13. Never consent to engaging in a marriage for a fixed period or in exchange for a sum of money. (Mut'a marriage).
Such marriages are expressly forbidden in Islam and entering into them is a sinful act, as marriage must be entered into with a clear intention of it being permanent, for life, not for a limited and fixed duration.

If these guidelines are followed, Insha' Allah the chances of making a mistake which may mar the remainder of your life may be minimised. Choosing a marriage partner is a most serious matter, perhaps the most serious decision you will ever make in your life since your partner can cause you either to be successful or to fail miserably, in the tests of this life and, consequently, in the Here- after. This decision needs to be made with utmost care and caution, repeatedly seeking guidance from your Lord. If everything checks out favourable, well and good, best wishes for happiness together here and in the Hereafter. If not, better drop the matter and wait. Allah your Lord knows all about you, His servant, and has planned your destiny and your partner for you. Be sure that He will bring you together when the time is right. As the Qur'an enjoins, you must be patient until He opens a way for you, and for your part you should actively explore various marriage leads and possibilities.

THE STATUS OF WOMEN IN ISLAM

I would ask you to consider two distinctly separate views regarding mankind: According to one, all men (including women) are equal, and therefore a sound social system is one that is based on the principle of absolute "equality". According to the other, all men (or women) are different – they are different in their mental, physical and emotional qualities, they are different in the opportunities life gives them and they are different in their natural strengths and weaknesses – and because they are different, a good society is not the one based on the principle of equality, but the one based on the principle of "justice". Just for the sake of further clarification, "equality" means that all persons should be dealt with equally, irrespective of their needs, abilities or strengths and weaknesses. In other words, according to this principle, a sound society is the one that places equal responsibilities and gives equal priveleges and authorities to its members. On the other hand, "justice" means that a person should be dealt with on the basis of what he deserves. In other words, acording to this principle, a sound society is the one that places responsibilities and gives priveleges and authorities to its members according to their abilities and qualities.

I would like to clearly state here (even at the risk of being misconstrued) that Islam has based its teachings on the presumption that all human beings are equal in all spheres of life, except in the case of their inherent abilities and in the case of their position in the family (or on a broader scale, the social) setup. In other words, Islam after accepting that all human beings are equal, and should be dealt with accoridng to the principle of equality, wants the society to give only two exceptions to this principle.

These exceptions are:

• Because human beings are different in their inherent abilities, a person (man or woman) with more abilities should have the opportunities to progress further in life as compared to a person (man or woman) with less abilities. The system adopted to insure "justice" in this sphere is quite a simple one. Islam simply advocates that there should be no artificial hinderances in the progress of a person (man or woman) with more abilities.
  

In this sense, Islam although allows a differentiation among individuals, but this differentiation is not based on the sex of the individuals, but on their abilities.

• Because a sound social setup is possible only through strengthening the basic unit of this setup, (i.e. the family) Islam wants the family to have a well defined authority-responsibility relationship.
  

According to the Qur’an, man and woman are two units of a pair. When both are taken independent of each other, there are ceretain obvious vacuums in the mental, physical and emotional personalities of each. God has created the two in such a way that they complement each other in different ways, so that these vacuums are generally removed to a great extent. For this very purpose, God gave different mental, physical and emotional qualities to the male and the female. These different mental, physical and emotional qualities, on the one hand complement man and woman, and on the other establishes for them different spheres of activity in their interpersonal relationships.

According to the Qur’an, man, for two reasons, should be the head of the family: One, because he is given the responsibility of earning the livelihood for the family (i.e. he is to strive for the provision of the financial requirements of the family); and two, because he is given the mental, physical and emotional qualities that are more suitable for this responsibility; just like women are given certain qualities that make them more suitable for responsibilities in a number of other spheres. It is only in this sphere (i.e. in the relationship of husband and wife) that God has given the man a degree of authority over the woman. Besides this sphere, both are considered equal.

If the above explanation is clearly understood, you shall be able to see that Islam does not assign a lower status to the womankind, as compared to the mankind, it is only in a particular relationship that one is given a degree of authority over the other, and that too for fulfilling the responsibility assigned to him from the perspective of this life as well as the hereafter. In this sense, it is the same thing as saying that:

• the parents (both male and female) are responsible for the well being of their children (both male and female) and therefore should be given a degree of authority over them; or
  

• the teachers (both male and female) are responsible for the well being of their pupil (both male and female) and therefore should be given a degree of authority over them; or
  

• the head of the state (whether male or female) is responsible for the well being of the citizens (both male and female) and therefore should be given a degree of authority over them.
  

I hope it is clear from the above explanation that in my opinion, Islam does not differentiate between the status of a man or a woman. It is only in the particular relationship of husband and wife that Islam gives a degree of authority to the husband. It would be as wrong to say on this basis that Islam gives women a lower status in the social setup as compared to men, as it would be to say that Islam gives men a lower status as compared to women on the basis of the degree of authority that a mother has over her male child.

THE IMPORTANCE OF TIME IN ISLAM

There are among those who believe in the popular saying as "Time is Gold." Time in Islam is more than Gold or any precious material thing in this world. Of all religions, only Islam guides mankind not only to the importance of time but also how to value it. Allah the Almighty and His Messenger, Prophet Mohammad (PBUH), very clearly tell us the value of time, why we must not waste it and how we can make use of our time wisely to increase our Eeman (Faith) and thus attain success, especially eternal success in the life hereafter.

The following are some of the most important duties demanded of Muslims:

1. Ensuring benefiting from time
2. Utilizing leisure time
3. Racing for good deeds
4. Learning from the passage of time
5. Seeking the superior times
6. Planning and organizing time
7. Fulfillment of time commitments
8. Necessary awareness of time wasters

Both the Qur'an and the Sunnah enjoin Muslims to be conscious of time. We are reminded that life in this world is nothing but temporary. We never know when death has been appointed for us. We must value time for the satisfaction of Allah the Almighty. For our guidance and success, we must never waste time nor abuse it.

Ibn Abbas narrated that Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) said:

"There are two blessings which many people lose: (They are) health and free time for doing good." (Bukhari 8/421)

Indeed, we displease Allah the Most High when we abuse time. We must remember that time must be spent to fulfill our very purpose in life that is to worship Allah all throughout our lives. Allah makes this very clear in the Qur'an when He says:

I have only created Jinns and Men, that they may serve Me. No Sustenance do I require of them, nor do I require that they should feed Me. For Allah is He Who gives (all) Sustenance, Lord of Power, Steadfast (for ever). Qur'an (51:56-58)

But celebrate the praises of thy Lord, and be of those who prostrate themselves in adoration. And serve thy Lord until there come unto thee the Hour that is certain (i.e., death). Qur'an (15:98-99)

Everything we do in accordance with the Qur'an and the Sunnah is an act of worship. Such worship must be done sincerely for the pleasure of Allah alone. We should make use of our time (which includes our "free time") in doing beneficial things especially those that will make us closer to Allah and earn His Mercy.

We have to make use of our time wisely by knowing more of the Qur'an and the Sunnah. We must have correct knowledge of what Allah and His Messenger Prophet Mohammad (PBUH) have commanded us to do and at the same time to refrain from what they have forbidden us. This is imperative so that we earn Allah's pleasure and reward. Allah the Exalted makes it very clear, when he says:

O ye who believe! Obey Allah, and obey the messenger, and make not vain your deeds! Qur'an (47:33)

Corollary to the above divine commandment, we must ask ourselves: Have we been obeying Allah and His Messenger? To what extent have we used our time learning the Qur'an and the Sunnah in order to have correct Eeman (Faith), to do righteous deeds, to enjoin the Truth or do Da'wah, and be patient and constant? As time passes by, are we sure we are devoting our time for the sincere worship and pleasure of Allah the Most High? Are we taking guidance from the following very enlightening Ayat (Qur'anic verses)?

By (the Token of) Time (through the ages), Verily Man is in loss, Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds, and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth, and of Patience and Constancy. Qur'an (103:1-3)

In line with the above Qur'anic injunction, we have to discipline ourselves by giving value to the importance of time. We must be prompt in doing good deeds, which will increase our faith and subsequently enable us to gain Allah's pleasure and mercy.

Islam encourages Muslims to care for time, to utilize it wisely and not to waste it and to benefit from it. Besides, it holds them responsible for their time.

We have to remember that on the Day of Judgment we shall be asked how we spent our lives, wealth and knowledge. In other words, we will be questioned on how we spent everything that Allah has given us as implied in the following Hadith:

O ye who believe! Obey Allah, and obey the messenger, and make not vain your deeds! Qur'an (47:33)

Corollary to the above divine commandment, we must ask ourselves: Have we been obeying Allah and His Messenger? To what extent have we used our time learning the Qur'an and the Sunnah in order to have correct Eeman (Faith), to do righteous deeds, to enjoin the Truth or do Da'wah, and be patient and constant? As time passes by, are we sure we are devoting our time for the sincere worship and pleasure of Allah the Most High? Are we taking guidance from the following very enlightening Ayat (Qur'anic verses)?

By (the Token of) Time (through the ages), Verily Man is in loss, Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds, and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth, and of Patience and Constancy. Qur'an (103:1-3)

In line with the above Qur'anic injunction, we have to discipline ourselves by giving value to the importance of time. We must be prompt in doing good deeds, which will increase our faith and subsequently enable us to gain Allah's pleasure and mercy.

Islam encourages Muslims to care for time, to utilize it wisely and not to waste it and to benefit from it. Besides, it holds them responsible for their time.

We have to remember that on the Day of Judgment we shall be asked how we spent our lives, wealth and knowledge. In other words, we will be questioned on how we spent everything that Allah has given us as implied in the following Hadith:

Narrated Abdullah Bin Mas`ud Allah's Messenger (PBUH) said:

"A man shall be asked concerning five things on the day of resurrection: concerning his life, how he spent it; concerning his youth, how he grew old; concerning his wealth, whence he acquired it, and in what way he spent it; and what was it that he did with the knowledge that he had."

The Prophet Mohammad (PBUH), used to call on Muslims to take the initiative to do good deeds before any obstacles arise. For instance, he said, "Lose no time to do good deeds before you are caught up by one of seven calamities awaiting you: a starvation which may impair your wisdom; a prosperity which may mislead you; an ailment which may damage your health; an old age which may harm your senses; a sudden death; the Dajjal (Antichrist); or Doomsday, which is indeed the hardest and most bitter." (at-Tirmidhi, al-Baihaqi)

The above Hadith urges Muslims to take the initiative, and not to delay good deeds; man's life is not free from impediments, such as those calamities, which can prevent him from accomplishing what could have been done earlier. Wise are those who grab available opportunities before being handicapped by obstacles.

If we are to evaluate ourselves objectively, have we been spending our time wisely for the pleasure of Allah the Almighty? Have we been spending our lives based on the Qur'an and the Sunnah? Have we been practicing Muslims? How many of us are Muminoon (Faithful Muslims) and/or Mutaqqoon (God Fearing Muslims)? How much knowledge of the Qur'an and the Sunnah do we know? Do we practice what we learn and impart the same to others or at least share them to our families and kin? Have we ever enjoined to others what is right and forbid what is wrong?

To be successful, we have to manage our time wisely by making plans for virtuous deeds that please Allah the Almighty. We must spend time learning Islam based on the Qur'an and the Sunnah.

Another Year Passes By and Time Marches On

O ye who believe! Fear Allah, and let every soul look to what (provision) He has sent forth for the morrow. Yea, fear Allah: for Allah is well-acquainted with (all) that ye do. Qur'an (59:18)

Another year has passed; minutes move into hours => into days => into weeks => into months => into years - seemingly faster than ever; yet every moment is a precious component of life and every moment counts.

Time - Use it, do not abuse it

Our attitude towards time indicates our attitude towards the value of the capital of life. If we want to purchase something, we require financial capital; and if we want to do something in life, we require the capital of life, time. That is why the Qur'an exhorts us to value the time we have before life is up. Qur'an (63:10)

Realize that...

• Time is the measure of life, time is an amaanah (trust), time is a gift from the Creator and its proper use will determine our outcome for eternity.
  

• We are born in time, live in time and die in time; time is the ambit within which we operate. What we do with time is what we do with our lives.
  

• Each one must realize that every moment that passes by is an opportunity gone, used or abused; never to return. Soon time will be up and we'll have to leave this physical world and give account for our lives.
  

• The more we remind ourselves of the responsibility of the present the better we get at living the moment and the better we live the present moment the better the consequence for the future.
  

Our attitude towards the future influences our mind-set towards the rest of life. Being positive about life ahead is among life's greatest motivators. Hope is the best attitude one can harbor towards the future; this realistic expectation that something good or better could/will happen if only we continue doing the best we can. Remember that today well-lived makes yesterday a dream of happiness and every tomorrow a vision of hope.

Wise are the words of the one who said ... "I expect to pass through this world but once; any good therefore that I can do, or any kindness that I can show to any fellow creature, let me do it now; let me not defer or neglect it, for I shall not pass this way again."
"O Allah! Make life a means for every dimension of goodness." [Prayer of the Prophet Mohammad (PBUH)

The Characteristics of Time

We are to bear in mind that time has certain characteristics, among of which are the following:

1. Time passes quickly.
   

2. Time that passes can never return, nor can it be compensated for, for time is irretrievable.
   

3. Time is the most precious thing that man possesses.

Muslim's Duty towards Time:

Having all this great value and importance, time is to be duly appreciated and managed. In Islam there is no room for slogans like the so-called "killing time", for in Islam time is really valuable. In fact, wasting time is much more dangerous than squandering property, because unlike property, time cannot be compensated. Free time is a blessing that is overlooked, and not wholly appreciated by many people.

This indicates that it's very important for a Muslim to try his utmost to husband his time and make the best use of it in beneficial things. A Muslim may use portion of his time in making invocations and supplications, celebrating the praises of Allah. The Prophet Mohammad (PBUH), used to supplicate:

O Allah! I seek refuge in You from sorrow and distress, and I seek refuge in You from disability and laziness."

A Muslim should learn how to organize his time, and make a realistic plan for his worldly and religious duties, without any of them overlapping the other. That is to say that one should know how to arrange his priorities: the most important and the most urgent comes first, and carried out according to schedule. Organizing time also includes leaving a place for relaxation and entertainment, for 'all work and no play make Jack a dull boy.'

One of the methods of managing his time properly is for a Muslim to get up early and sleep early, for early hours always yield great blessings. Starting his day with prayer and the supplication of the morning brings the Muslim Allah's grace. A Muslim should always bear in mind that every time has its own task that suits it. Doing tasks in their due times brings about peace of mind and comfort.

Finally, we would like to cite the following Hadith of the Prophet Mohammad (PBUH), quoting from the Book of Ibrahim, peace be upon him: "A sane person, unless he is mindless, should have four hours: an hour to invoke to his Lord, an hour to count his own deeds, an hour to contemplate about the creation of Allah and an hour to satisfy his worldly needs."

Verily, time is very important for our success both in this temporary world and the eternal world to come. If we waste time, if we abuse it, then we waste and abuse our lives. In the Life Hereafter we will be among the losers, who will suffer the torments in the Hell Fire, if Allah the Almighty will not forgive us. Therefore, if we really give value to our lives then, we must give due value to the importance of time.

WOMEN IN ISLAM

A woman is a flower vase of beauty and fragrance. So smell her gently, do not wrestle with her! - Imam Ali (as)

Women are like flowers. Do not put on them responsibilities they can not bear! - Imam Ali (as)

According to Islam, being a human, woman is even superior to angels and all other living organisms. If she performs any good task or deed, she will be equally blessed as much as a man will for his good deeds.

She is the benefactor and patron of Islam, as lady Khadija (Wife of Holy Prophet [saw]).

She is a partner of prophethood, as lady Fatima (Daughter of Holy Prophet [saw]).

She is one of the greatest leaders, as lady Zainab (Daughter of Imam Ali [as])

She superior to man, as a mother.

She's respectable like a saint.

She is precious like an expensive pearl.

She is honorable like a delicate rose.

Islam emphasizes the equality of all people, regardless of race, ethnicity, gender or social status. Islam has prescribed different roles and responsibilities for men and women, with each gender complementing the other. Centuries before the modern world recognized women's rights, Islam acknowledged the equality of the two genders, and abolished the barbaric ritual of burying infant daughters alive, an outrageous crime practiced by the Arabs before the time of the Holy Prophet (peace be upon him).

Islam made women aware of their rights and gave them an identity, a personality, freedom, and independence. These rights, among others, include the right to inherit, to own property, to obtain a divorce, to collect a dowry, and to gain child custody. Regarding the equality of the genders, the Holy Qur'an states:

"Surely the men who submit and the women who submit, and the believing men and the believing women, and the obeying men and the obeying women, and the truthful men and the truthful women, and the patient men and the patient women and the humble men and the humble women, and the almsgiving men and the almsgiving women, and the fasting men and the fasting women, and the men who guard their private parts and the women who guard, and the men who remember Allah much and the women who remember-Allah has prepared, for them forgiveness and a mighty reward." (33:35)

Muslims consider four ladies to be the most noble and pious:

1. Aasiya - Wife of Fir'awn / Pharoah (peace be upon her)

2. Maryam / Mary - Mother of Isa / Jesus (peace be upon her)

3. Khadija - Wife of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon her)

4. Fatima - Daughter of Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon her)

MOTHER (THE FOUNTAIN OF LIFE)

And the paradise is under the feet of your mothers. - Prophet Muhammad (saw)

Islam has greatly emphasized the issue of loving and respecting the parents, the father and the mother. In our infancy and childhood, we needed the protection, love and nurturing of the parents; but when they become old, they need us to protect them and take care of them.

"Your Lord has commanded that you shall not worship (anyone) but Him and to be good to the parents. If either or both of them reach old age with you, say not to them (so much as) 'Ugh' nor chide them, and speak to them a generous word. And lower for them 'the wings of humility' out of mercy; and pray; 'O my Lord! Have mercy on them as they brought me up (when I was) little.'" (17:23-24)

However, out of the two, the mother has been given greater priority as far as kindness is concerned. Once Hakim bin Hizam came to the Prophet of Islam and asked: "To whom should I be kind?" The Prophet replied, "Your mother." Hakim asked, "Then to whom?" The Prophet said, "Your mother." Hakim asked, "Then to whom?" The Prophet replied, "Your mother." Only when Hakim asked the fourth time that, "Then to whom?" the Prophet replied, "Your father." This shows that the right of mother upon the children is three times more than the rights of father as far as kindness is concerned.

Imam Ali bin Hussain, the great-grandson of the Prophet, said: "Coming to the rights of relatives, it is the right of your mother that you should appreciate that she carried you [in her womb] as nobody carries anybody, and fed you the fruits of her heart which nobody feeds anybody, and protected you [during pregnancy] with her ears, hands, legs, hair, limbs, [in short] with her whole being, gladly, cheerfully and carefully; suffering patiently all the worries, pains, difficulties and sorrows [of pregnancy], till the hand of God removed you from her and brought you into this world."

"Then she was most happy feeding you, even if she herself had no clothes; giving you milk and water; not caring for her own thirst; keeping you in the shade, even if she had to suffer from the heat of the sun; giving you every comfort with her own hardship; lulling you to sleep while keeping herself awake."

"And [remember that] her womb was your abode, and her lap your refuge, and her breast your feeder, and her whole existence your protection; it was she, not you, who was braving the heat and cold of this world for your safety."

"Therefore, you must remain thankful to her accordingly, and you cannot do so except by the help and assistance from Allah." (The Charter of Right, p.18)


WOMEN'S ROLE IN ISLAM

The Purpose of Life: Wherever God talks about the human beings (Insaan) or whenever He talks about human soul (Nafs) in the Qur'an, Muslims theologians and scholars have never considered that humanness or the soul as 'male' or 'female'. (See 51:56, 91:1-10; 53:38-39)

The male or female division is only possible when we talk about the physical dimension of humans, not when we talk about the spiritual dimension. And so, from the Islamic perspective, the humanness of woman has never been denied or questioned; nor has there ever been any discussion whether she possesses a soul or not.

Since both are same in their humanness, both have been created for the same purpose: to serve God.

The Virtues in Human Beings: Whenever and wherever Islam has talked about virtues in human beings, it has not differentiated between men and women. Both have the potential to acquire knowledge. Both, men and women, are expected to exhibit the spirit of piety and other good attributes in Islam.


MODESTY & DECENCY (HIGHEST ACHIEVEMENT FOR HUMANITY

The beauty of a woman:
Is not in the clothes she wears,
the figure that she carries,
or the way she combs her hair,
or the style she does make up.
The beauty of a woman:
must be seen in her Hijab, and her eyes,
because that is the doorway to her heart,
the place where love resides.
The beauty of a woman:
is not in a facial mole,
but true beauty in a woman,
is reflected in her soul.
The beauty of woman is in her modesty.
And the real glamour of her is her honesty.
It is the caring that she lovingly gives,
the passion that she shows.
And the beauty of a woman,
with passing years - only grows!

HOLY QUR'AN PROCLAIMS: O Prophet! Tell thy wives and daughters, and the believing women, that they should cast their outer garments over their persons (when abroad): that is most convenient, that they should be known (as such) and not molested. And Allah is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful. ( Soorah-e-Ahzaab, verse 59)

And say to the believing women that they should lower their gaze and guard their modesty; that they should not display their beauty and ornaments except what (must ordinarily) appear thereof; that they should draw their veils over their bosoms and not display their beauty except to their husbands, their fathers, their husband's fathers, their sons, their husbands' sons, their brothers or their brothers' sons, or their sisters' sons, or their women, or the slaves whom their right hands possess, or male servants free of physical needs, or small children who have no sense of the shame of sex; and that they should not strike their feet in order to draw attention to their hidden ornaments. And O ye Believers! turn ye all together towards Allah, that ye may attain Bliss. ( Soorah-e-Noor, verse 31)

Islam does not allow free and unrestricted intermingling of the sexes. The rule of modesty applies to men as well as women.

CORRUPT VS PURE: Women impure are for men impure, and men impure for women impure and women of purity are for men of purity, and men of purity are for women of purity: these are not affected by what people say: for them there is forgiveness, and a provision honorable. (Holy Quran 24:26)

A woman's best Jewelry is her Shyness. - Lady Fatima Zehra (sa)

Nice girls are with Hijaab. - Prophet Muhammad (saw)


HAJIRA (MOTHER OF ISHMAEL):

Prophet Ibrahim had become over 90 years old and had no child. Sarah, his wife, gave her slave-girl, by name of Hajira, to Ibrahim as a wife. Through Hajira, Almighty God blessed Ibrahim with a son: Ishmael (peace be upon him).

Sarah became jealous of Hajira. Finally, decided to test the patience of Ibrahim by asking him to take Hajira and the infant Ishmael into a desert and leave them there. Ibrahim was guided to that desert area which later became famous as Mecca. Prophet Ibrahim brought Hajira and Ishmael to Mecca and left them as commanded by God.

Whatever provisions Ibrahim had brought for his wife and child finally ran out. The baby Ishmael started crying out of thirst. Hajira set out in search for water. She was standing on the small hill of Safa; she looked towards the hill of Marwah and thought that there was water over there. When she reached Marwah, there was not water; it was just a mirage. She turned facing Safa and thought that there was water over there. She returned to Safa, but there was no water; it was just a mirage.

As mother, desperately looking for water for her child, Hajira ran between the hills of Safa and Marwah seven times. Finally, she saw that a water stream had started at the feet of Ishmael. This miraculous steam is still running on beside the Kaaba, the House of God, and it is known as Zamzam.

God so much loved the spirit of motherhood demonstrated by Hajira - ho ran seven times between the hills of Safa and Marwah in search of water for her child that, He has commanded the Muslim pilgrims to walk between the hills of Safa and Marwah when they go for the pilgrimage.

The ritual of walking between the two hills of Safa and Marwah seven times is an essential part of pilgrimage and it perpetuates the memory of Hajira as a mother.


ASIYA BINT MUZAHIM (THE PHARAOH'S WIFE):

The holy Qur'an has presented Asiya bint Muzahim as one of the best role models for women.

Asiya's greatness is in the fact that although she was the wife of one of the most Powerful, arrogant and tyrant rulers of Egypt, she was able to see and accept the truth in message of Prophet Moses. For her, wealth, beauty or status was not the main criterion of human excellence; she realized that without faith in God, a human being has nothing.

God had chosen her to provide refuge to Moses when he was an infant. When her maids brought the cradle of Moses from the river, she insisted to Pharaoh that she wanted to adopt that infant as a child: The wife of Pharaoh said: "(Here is) joy of the eye, for me and for thee: slay him not. It may be that he will be use to us, or we may adopt him as a son." And they perceived not (what they were doing)! (28:9)

Asiya bint Muzahim had declared her faith in the message of God after witnessing the miracle of Moses in the Court of Pharaoh; and after witnessing the death of another believing, woman under torture. Pharaoh tried to turn her away from the God of Moses and sought her mother's help. But Asiya refused to reject the God of Moses. On Pharaoh's order, she Was tortured to death.

The Qur'an says: "And Allah gives an example for those who believe: the wife of pharaoh. (Remember) when she said, 'My Lord! Build for me a house with Thee in the Paradise, and deliver me from Pharaoh and his deeds; and deliver me from the unjust people.'" (66:11)

In this lady, we see the example of supreme sacrifice: By marrying Pharaoh, Asiya bint Muzahim became the Queen of Egypt, she gained everything that she wanted in this worldly life from the materialistic point of view: the best of clothes, food, palaces, jewels, servants and maids, etc. But she sacrificed all that to be closer to Allah. And that is why we see her included by the Prophet in the list of the four women who attained the level of perfection.


MARY (MOTHER OF JESUS):

Mary is one of the noblest women in Islamic teachings since she was chosen to miraculously give birth to the Prophet Jesus.

When the Angel approached her with the news that she has been chosen as mother of the Prophet who is to be born miraculously without a father, she was perplexed. She said, "When shall I have a boy and no man has yet touched me, nor have I been unchaste?"

The Angel conveyed the answer of God: "It is easy for Me. And We intend to make Jesus a sign to people and a mercy from Us; and this is a matter which has been decreed."

She was alone when the throes of childbirth compelled her to take refuge by the trunk of a palm tree. She was distressed and said, "I wish that I had died before this, and had been a thing quite forgotten!"

Right then, Jesus was born and he called out: "Grieve not, surely your Lord has made a stream to flow beneath you; and shake towards you the trunk of the palm-tree, it will drop on you fresh ripe dates. So eat, drink and refresh the eyes." She was also told: "If you see people, do not worry about their questions. Just say that you have make a vow to that you shall not speak to any person today."

When she came back to his people with Jesus, they said, "O Mary! Surely you have done a strange thing; your parents were not unchaste people!" She pointed towards the baby. They responded, "How can we speak to a child in the cradle?" At that moment, Jesus, by the power of God, started to speak. He said:

"Surely I am the servant of God, He has given me the Book and made me a prophet. He has made me blessed wherever I may be. He has enjoined on me to pray, to give charity so long as I live, and to be dutiful to my mother. He has not made me insolent and unblessed. So peace upon me on the day I was born, on the day I die, and on the day I shall be raised back to life."

This is the story of the Virgin Mary and her son, Jesus, the Prophet and Messenger of God, as mentioned in Chapter 19 of the Qur'an.


KHADIJA (THE WIFE OF PROPHET MUHAMMAD):

Khadija bint Khuwaylid, the wife of the Prophet, is truly known as a noble lady; she was, in the modern terminology, the First Lady of Islam.

During the Meccan phase of Islam's movement, Khadija was the main pillar of support for Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him). She was the first one to declare her faith in Islam. Her declaration of faith was a great testimony of the Prophet's character: a wife knows her husband's outer as well as inner character. By being the first to accept person to accept Islam, Khadija demonstrated that she believed in the truthfulness of Muhammad as the Messenger of God.

The initial years of Islam's mission were very trying; the Prophet faced severe opposition from the people of Mecca. In face of this rejection, Khadija provided the moral support and boasted the morale of the Prophet. According to Muslims historians, he even used to consult and discuss with her the issues related to the Islamic movement.

Khadija whole-heartedly supported the Prophet's cause by placing her wealth at his disposal. Almighty God has praised that by addressing the Prophet: "Did We not find you in need and made your free of need?" (93:8) It was through Khadija's wealth that the Almighty made the Prophet self-sufficient in his financial needs.

Although Khadija came from a very affluent background, she did not shy from sacrificing her wealth for the cause of Islam. Not only that, she even willingly went through the difficulties of three years of social/economic embargo imposed upon Prophet Muhammad and his family, the Banu Hashim. The hardship of these three years eventually resulted in her death.

It is to her credit that the Prophet of Islam did not marry another woman as long as Khadija was alive; she was the only wife who bore children for him. The name of Prophet continued through Fatima, the daughter of the Prophet and Khadija.


FATIMA (THE DAUGHTER OF THE PROPHET):

Jab Kabhi Ghairat-e-Insaan Ka Sawaal Aata Hai
Bint-e-Zehra Terey Pardey Ka Khayaal Aata Hai

Fatima bint Muhammad is one of the four noblest women in Islamic teachings. This is not just because she is the daughter of the Prophet of Islam or the wife of Imam Ali or the mother of Hasan and Hussain. These relationships are significant in themselves, but Fatima is important to the Muslims in her own right.

Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) is seen as the perfect model of the values and teachings that were revealed in the holy Qur'an. He was the Last Prophet and the Qur'an was the Final Revelation: no prophet or scripture is to be sent after him. However, the Prophet was a man and so he could not be a complete role model for half of the humanity; therefore, there was a need for a perfect female model of Qur'anic values and teachings. And that role model for women was Fatima, the daughter of the Prophet. This is how Fatima is part of the Prophet; she completes the female dimension of the Prophet's function as a complete role model for humanity.

That is why the Prophet of Islam described Fatima as follows: "The leader of all the ladies of Paradise." (Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 4, p.819.)

"Fatima is a part of me, and he who makes her angry, makes me angry." (Sahih al-Bukhari, vol. 5, p. 61.)

According to the holy Qur'an (33:33) she is among the infallibles ones in Islam. This status of infallibility comes with being a part of the Prophetic mission: he is the perfect role model for the men whereas she is the perfect role model for women.

Fatima was not only a loving daughter, a loyal wife and a caring mother; she is known in history as a woman of knowledge and wisdom, and she actively stood up for her rights. An excellent example of her social activism can be seen when she was denied her inheritance upon her father's death. Fatima challenged the authorities in power on basis of the Qur'an. She argued that the Qur'an has examples where the children of past prophets inherited their father. Using the Qur'an as her basis, she argued that she should not be denied her right.

PROPERTIES OF THE BEST WOMEN:

• She is content: Such woman is the best one who becomes happy and content when her husband puts a loving glance on her, and when he orders her for something right, she obeys him immediately, and never does any thing against his will. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
  

• She is a great cook and a good administrator: A woman who cooks neat, clean and delicious food for her husband. Allah has provided great food for such nice wife in paradise. In heaven, she will be asked to drink and eat whatever you wish, as this is the reward for the pain and services which you performed for your husband! - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
  

• The best woman among your women is one who cooks delicious food, spends the money justly and does not waste it. Such women are the workers of Allah, and the workers of Allah never get hopeless and regretful! - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
  

• She is priceless: A woman doesn't have any price, whether she is good or bad. A good and nice lady can not be measured with money or gold or silver, as she is far more expensive and precious than money or gold. Similarly, a woman with bad character and worst nature can not be compared with sand, as sand is far more higher and good than her. - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
  

• She is loving, caring and patient: Do not you want me to tell you about those ladies who will enter paradise? A woman who is loving and caring to her husband, and gives births to his children and when he gets angry with her, she instantly says My hand is in your hand like she does not get satisfied until her husband becomes happy with her. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)
  

• She is obedient: Lucky and fortunate woman is one who respects her husband and does not give him any pain, hurt or discomfort and does not makes him worried and obeys him in all the right aspects of life. - Imam Jafer-e-Sadiq (as)
  

• She does Jehaad: The Jehaad of woman is that she must not lose her patience if she gets hurt from her husband. Her patience is her Jehaad. - Holy Prophet Muhammad (saw)